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Why stay married? Watch 30 minutes of almost any primetime network TV show on
any given evening and you'll be presented with lots of reasons not to stay
married. Sex, adventure, excitement, change of scenery, change of pace. You name
it, you'll see it...lots of reasons to walk away.
Pick up the newspaper. Lots of press these days about 'different kinds of
families'. What they really mean is families where marriage isn't a factor.
Couples living together without the 'complication' of marriage. The latest
relational experiment.
So for those of us who happen to be married now, why bother staying together?
After all, isn't it boring? Monotonous? Predictable? Lackluster? (There are more
adjectives where those came from!)
The truth is there are LOTS of reasons to stay together. Like history. We who
are married have written a story together. Granted not all the chapters are
cheery. Some of them tell tales of significant challenges, even times of defeat.
But many of them shine with the joy of deep committment and lasting soul
satisfaction.
How about this for a reason: even with it's challenges, it's the best we'll
have. Don't get me wrong...I'm suggesting you're some pathetic loser who was
just darn lucky to find ANYONE. What I'm saying is that even though the media
subtly attempts to persuade us that there may be someone better 'out there
somewhere', the truth is, we're just plain blessed to be in a relationship with
that other person.
Yeah, they've got their flaws, their quirks, their idiosyncrasies. But
they're flaws, quirks, and idiosycrasies we KNOW about. Who'd you REALLY like to
start over with a WHOLE NEW SET OF BAGGAGE??? And besides all that...we've got
OUR BAGGAGE TOO! Maybe the market is down on our particular baggage.
Reasons to stay together...oh, yeah, how about the kids? As a pastor,
sometimes I do weddings that you need a therapist just to get everyone in the
same room. It's his second or her third and they've got offspring of all ages
and names. How about a playbook next time...or a diagram of the existing family
tree...or should I say forest?
Bottom line, it's up to each of us to find our own reasons to keep it
together. This I know...whatever reason we find, there is a reward and a
satisfaction for those who make it work. It's the look in the eyes of an old
couple that speaks to the years this love has spanned, the bumps in the road
they've endured, the storms they've overcome.
I want to have that look in MY eyes one day...as my bride and I smile
knowingly at each other from one rocking chair to the other. Yeah, we did it
babe...thanks!
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